I was having a chat with my boyfriend about our anal journey and I asked him if I didn’t like anal sex would he be with me. He reminded me that before he met me, he was an anal virgin. He said he never really considered it as an option and that we only really did oral sex for the first few months. He said he only wanted me, anal or not which was sweet although I’m not sure I would stay with him now, if he withheld anal sex from me!
How would anyone feel if their significant other decided they did not want anal sex? Is it a dealbreaker?
If she would now switch from anal only to no anal anymore, I would be devestated. I wouldn’t be able to comprehend it, really.
I had two women in my life before her, who were okay with anal (the first) and asked me if I wanted to assfuck her (the second). With both the anal sex came to a stop due to different reasons.
The first it was me who stopped trying because she simply couldn’t relax. It never bottered me much. She really tried.
The second was a whole other situation. She wanted anal, and really loved it. She enjoyed it almost as much as vaginal sex. During her periods she declared them “other hole week”. But after 2,5 years together her toxic nature started to emurge really fast.
To take me down mentally, she started to act like I forced her to assfuck and refused to do it with the words “real men fuck pussy, you must a covert gay or something”. So it stopped and a few months later we got devorced because she was unable to manipulate me.
My girlfriend enjoys having my cock up her ass, more then anything. I never experienced a woman who moans as sweet and intense as she does during sex. And she enjoys herself the most while my cock is up her ass. I can not imagine this will suddenly change.
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I’m with your girlfriend. I like nothing more than a cock in my ass. Its better than anything else.
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This is a great question with an answer that depends entirely on each person’s unique situation and circumstances.
Mrs Colt and I have been married for 43 years. “Discovering” anal many years into our relationship was a mind-blowing experience. Because she only orgasms during anal penetration, the only reason she’d reject anal would be for health related reasons or to hurt me. We have a great relationship making the latter reason unlikely. I certainly wouldn’t leave her if health related reasons prevented her from engaging in anal sex.
It is much more likely I will experience difficulty maintaining a hard enough erection to engage in anal sex. This is one of the many reasons both of us maintain a healthy diet, exercise, and do what we can to stay healthy.
Our anal only lifestyle is so important I’m evaluating the efficacy of the “P shot” or priapus shot. This involves removal of blood, centrifuging into platelet rich plasma, and then injecting into the penis. This improves blood flow resulting in firmer erections. It can also increase length and girth, although that isn’t of interest to me. I’ve noticed I’m not as hard as I once was so I’m considering giving it a try to see if it makes a difference.
God forbid, if I’m unable to enjoy anal sex with Mrs Colt, I know how to keep her ass happy with tongue, fingers, and toys so she can continue to enjoy her powerful, and often multiple, anal orgasms.
As an elder in this group I realize the question pertains to younger persons or others in shorter term relationships. If I were younger or in a shorter term relationship, I would be quite concerned if my partner suddenly decided anal sex was off the table. That won’t happen with us and I’m doing what I can to enjoy anal sex for many more years to “cum”.
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I’m first targeting for a loving partner that wants me for who I am, and then try to get her into anal if it’s possible.
Would that be a deal breaker? Probably not, although it would mean one of my dreams laid to waste. I feel I kind of only have one shot at it because all girls I’v ever known only want me as a friend.
Mr Colt. Your response warms my heart. Your relationship with Mrs Colt is inspirational to me. You seem to have a plan in place for most eventualities and open discussion. I hope you and Mrs Colt continue to enjoy anal love for many more years to cum!
When my boyfriend and I got together, anal was not really an interest to both of us. We enjoyed an oral only relationship however as my interest in re-exploring anal and my trust in Dale grew our decision to adopt an AO relationship was a lot easier. Please don’t give up and I hope you find someone who will share your love of anal sex.
Have you tried a PDE5? They improve quality, quantity and recovery of erection.
I’ve seen those used on my father for his liver problems. Any other uses would not be a conversation I would have with him!
Yes, I have tried both and they do work but I’d like my cock to be as rock hard as it was when I was 30. Atherosclerosis can also occur in the penis and the priapus shot can be extremely effective in drastically improving blood flow. I just have to get over the fact they’ll stick a needle in my cock several times and then one in the head of my cock.
I’m just trying to avoid the stress of a situation where I’m not quite hard enough to penetrate her. Spending a few bucks and experiencing momentary discomfort is well worth the potential benefit. I will report back to the group with results after I give it a try. I admit I wasn’t thrilled about the prospect of injections in my cock but if it makes me rock hard, it will make both of us happy.
Mrs Colt and I are both on hormone replacement therapy. Therapy boosted her libido incredibly which led to her discovering anal orgasm and pleasure. Six months later I started testosterone replacement therapy which also boosted my libido. I highly recommend older members consider HRT as well. Many additional benefits besides a boost in sex drive.
Thank you. We are fortunate but worked through difficult times as so many couples do. Most importantly, she is my very best friend. We enjoy each others company both in and outside of the bedroom. Anal took our intimate relationship to an entirely different level. We have an “agreement” that I must be the first to go because she is stronger than I am. We laugh at the prospect we both perish during an exceptionally intimate anal encounter but then she worries our adult children will discover the myriad of plugs, anal toys, and leather harness we’ve accumulated over the years. I think it would be hilarious and know our kids would smile, laugh, and realize their parents loved each other and enjoyed an active sex life. I hope everyone in this group can enjoy a similar relationship with their mate. It matters.
Dale and I are best buddies. We have a fun sex life but our relationship goes far deeper than that. I guess that’s why we work so well together. We are still anal novices and we have learned so much from some people on these forums and many have been helpful in guiding our initial journey. Tiff and I took our journey in a different direction. We have a lot of fun as a couple and with our friends and that really helps us work.
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(This is not “medical advice” and I am NOT a medical practitioner; it is based on my personal experience with the subject.)
Colt1911… Given your age and the realities of what happens to men’s bodies as we get older … if you have not already gotten a testosterone test … I found it critically important that I got a proper testosterone blood test (after first discussing exactly which test with my doctor), before I considered any remedies. Proper testosterone levels are critically important to many aspects of men’s health, including mental state, etc., etc., etc. Checking testosterone level should be done before considering any “blue pills”, etc. -- otherwise one may be addressing a secondary symptom instead of a primary symptom.
BTW, I found it to be… a) be very important I was getting tested at least annually properly to determine the proper level of HRT medication needed (and to guide my application of it) to get to my personal target level and b) to stick to legitimate medication sources and c) because testosterone is absurdly costly at least in the U.S., I talked to a legitimate and preferably local compounding pharmacy. A compounding pharmacy, working with my doctor, formulated exactly the concentration I needed to meet my personal goal… at much lower cost than pre-packaged medication. Initially, my insurance did cover testosterone (up to some dollar level, that was a long time ago), but I still saved a LOT of money (thousands of dollars) by using a compounding pharmacy… but – and it is a big but – if insurance coverage is available at all, it is likely only to be covered if the dosage is different than the available pre-packaged products. Thus I coordinated between my doctor and the compounding pharmacy to have a non-available dosage prescribed – and then the compounded version was covered (back then). The compounding pharmacy just mixes a powder into a cream base so they can make any concentration that is prescribed.
Unfortunately, in the U.S., Medicare does not seem to cover testosterone, so tough luck to millions of older men in the U.S. For some men, the effects of low testosterone can be so severe that testosterone (HRT) medication can be almost as important as food and water, etc.
I don’t know that I can really answer AbbiT05’s question in a simple way.
I do know giving up anal would be very, very hard. But I am with the lady I am with because I love her the person, not because of the type or quantity of sex we have. I remember something about “… for better or worse …”.
That being said, there would have to be a darn good reason to give up anal sex. If her reason was just “I no longer want to” and she had no interest in trying to determine or explain why, that would be a very tough pill for me to swallow because the “better or worse” was something agreed to by both of us.
However, as we both get older (and she is a few years older than I am), I am very aware that “health stuff happens” and there very well may come a day when one or the other of us is just not able.
Rather than worrying about her no longer being interested, I focus my energy on being the best husband I can be (which is not easy!) and doing everything within my control to promote a happy and healthy life for us both (again, not easy for complicated reasons for a different type of forum). A happy wife is much more likely to be a sexually active wife. 
Hormone replacement therapy is the reason I’m active in this group. My wife started HRT and her libido went nuclear. Suddenly, her rectum became her G-spot, and the cock she swore would never penetrate her sweet hole was welcome balls deep. We believe many decades of birth control meds stunted her libido. It was truly amazing.
Not long after she started HRT, I was tested and started testosterone replacement therapy. Initially the patch, then 4 years of injectable testosterone, and now I’m treating with testosterone pellets. Mrs Colt gave me weekly shots and I’d tell her it’s her turn to stick it my ass.
TRT improved my libido in addition to helping me maintain muscle mass and sleep better. I’ve recommended everyone in the group consider HRT as they age. Our sex life is so good, we’re very motivated to stay healthy to prolong our sessions for as many years as possible.
The thought of old people banging has to be repulsive to the young in this group, but they’ll see it differently as they get older! Anal was an amazing later in life discovery for us. HRT made it happen.
Tbh, I used to think older people just stopped doing it after awhile until I saw a report once about how old people in assisted living and such places are basically more promiscuous than any other demographic.
I guess when you’re 85 you figure what the hell, you’re not living long enough to deal with consequences like STDs and you don’t have to worry about pregnancy so go out with a bang.
Going out with a bang? Nah, going out with a couple of bangs a day 
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They also have a lot of time on their hands.
I think the idea that old people don’t have sex comes from the wish of children to imagine their parents as such. That, and from teleological scholars and theologians looking at them, going: “Huh, they can’t have babies. No point to have sex then, so clearly they don’t have any.”
How many elders speak up and out against that idea? And for that matter, since when do people actually talk about their sex lives?
And thus, legends are born.
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I remember when my son was 11. My then wife and I were 43 and she was a good looking woman.
At diner my son suddenly makes this statement how we didn’t need to have sex anymore, because we had two kids and weren’t planning for more.
We laughed. He got confused and said “so you still have sex ? In this house ? With us in the rooms next to you ?”
So funny.
At least my girlfriends kids know we have sex. They heard us enjoy it every now and then when we’re not able to hold back.
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Rhetorical question of course, but thankfully this group provides an opportunity to discuss that which we can’t share with nearly everyone we know. @AbbiT05 is the exception in this group because if you have sex with your friends, you should be able to discuss it with them!
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